My University life has been the centre of my life. So much work to do. This is my 2nd week and already I have a pile of work that needs to be done. Assignments keep coming. I am so stressed and tired to the point that I'm sick. I got tonsillitis, head ache and fever. Yup, it's already hard I'm sick and I still got to do my work. It sucks so bad. 

I hope everyone has been fine. Unlike me. I start my practical which is teaching, next week. I'm quite scared but hopefully everything will go smooth as silk. Ok, I must go back to my studies now. It is nearly 11pm. I have to wake up early because I have to go to court tomorrow for one of my unit. 

God bless you all :)

I have feelings ya' know....

If you're wondering why my title is like that, I will tell you why. I started a relationship with this guy. We have been a couple for almost a week. Everything was sweet and close to perfection. Then suddenly on Monday night, he dropped the bomb on me saying he needed time alone. Ok... I tried to ask him what's up as I do care about him, I'd want to hear him out and be his shoulders to lean/cry on. But he insisted "everything will be alright". I have been sending him messages, telling him "have a blessed day today ^^" for the past 2 days straight. He just reads it and ignores me. Before he went into his total "shut down", he said he would never leave me and all that jazz. I am someone who is a negative thinker. I will admit that. It's so hard for me to think positive due to the past experiences I had with my ex. Mind you, I tried very hard to not think negative but I just couldn't.... 

I told mum about this. I usually am not open on these sorts of things. I am someone who tends to bottle up my feelings and try to sort out the issue by myself until I cannot handle it no more, that's when I break away aka cry like a baby. I cried so hard in front of mum. Surprisingly, she was supportive as ever. She said to have faith in him and all that. Thanks mum, but honestly, I can't. I've been feeling down for the past 2 days and 1 night. Haven't been getting enough sleep due to think, on top of that, I injured my neck. I dropped them weight bar on my shoulder. Oh snap! thank goodness I didn't break my neck. So I basically feel pain both physically and mentally. 

My friend told me to give it a rest. Try not to think about it. I can't. I'm a deep thinker. I think negative. This is who I am. So what I'm doing right now is just to turn off my phone for a couple of days and take the time to rest up and sleep. At this rate, I don't even think he would message me by... Saturday. I'm just sick of it. I don't appreciate people who makes me smile and then BOOM, they drop me like I'm some sort of an object. I don't even appreciate people that likes to leave me out in the dark, not knowing what on earth is going on. Call me selfish you may, but at least I tried by giving him signs that I do care about him and worry about. I do pray and hope to dear Lord that he will message me back, telling me he misses me and all. I also pray that everything will go back to how it was before. Honestly, that 1 week with him .. it was beautiful. 

I hope God has been listening to my prayers. I've never cried so hard and pray at the same time... This is such a horrible feeling I'm feeling right now :(

Good and Bad News. WHAT?

I'm sorry for abandoning my blog. Been busy with health and personal things. Hehehe. Yesterday I went for a CT scan. I was nervous as hell. I hate CT scans. When you're laying on the bed, getting scanned, there is the hot feeling from the iodine that is injected to you. And then you feel like you're going to pee on your undie. Hahaha but it's true. The results were both good and bad. The good, no more pulmonary embolism aka blood clot. Yay :) No more taking blood test. Thank you God for that. The bad, the CT scans have picked up few things on both my lungs. I really got no idea what they are since it is typed up in medical terms. However, I am somewhat pleased that the scan have picked those up. During the flight back from Singapore to Sydney, I felt so uncomfortable on my chest. When I was holidaying, I was feeling discomfort already, but gradually I feel it more and more. I'm going to the doctor next week, so hopefully I get some answers and she could aid me with some medication. I hope it's not serious as well. 

I hope everyone is doing fine and staying healthy. I haven't been to the gym lately due to my discomfort feeling. On top of that, Sydney has been such a bad ass with the weather. Twice this week it was 41 degrees. Are you kidding me Sydney? You're so much worst than Indonesia and Singapore. Not happy at all. Ooohh.. with Jakarta's flooding. I hope those of you in Jakarta are not and were not affected so bad. Hold on guys, it will be over soon. Be positive. Prayers from Sydney for all of you out there :)

God bless.

I'm back!

Hello everyone. I'm back from my holiday. It was a joyous holiday. Met loads of relatives and ate loads of yummylicious food. It's nearly 2013, OMG. 2012 has been a great yet interesting year for me. A lot happened this year, both the good and bad. But regardless, it taught me a valuable lessons about life. Can't wait for 2013 to start. It will be amazing yet it will be somewhat hard because that is when I start my Masters Degree. However, these are a couple of my 2013 resolutions...

- Maintain fitness and diet
- Less spending on the unwanted things
- Save money
- Study hard and no procrastinating!
- Change the negativity, stubbornness and impatient-ness in me that sometimes drives my parents crazy
- Appreciate my family and friends more!
- Know how to control my emotions better
- Pray more
- Be thankful more

By making new year's resolution, you have things to look out for. These are goals in life that not only for the specific year, but it is lifetime goals. So what are your 2013 resolutions? :)

How's it going party people? I hope you are all fine and staying healthy. I have been having fun switching my work out routines daily. I'm going overseas in .... less than 2 weeks. Omg! It's going to be extremely .. fun? Haha. I'm not looking forward to meeting my relatives though. They are the type of people who have no problem with saying things like "you're fat". Well at least I am working out unlike them. So whatever they say will really back fire on them. Muahahah :)

I have been asked to do video logs. A few of my friends would like to hear how I sound when I speak English. It's kind of flattering ... Haha. But yes, I am still considering to make videos and posting it on my blog. If you have any ideas on what kind of videos I should make, please do let me know. You can email me your ideas. My email can be found on the left section of this blog. 

Ok, I'm going to return to my date with Grimm. Such a good series! Love it!

Yesterday I went to the gym. I didn't really do much. That's to be honest. Reason being was because I met my church friend and were gossiping hahaha. But then I did work out though. It was good to catch up with her because she is my gym buddy. Anyways, yesterday was such an eye-opener day for me and here is the reason why ...

I just got done doing a chest work out. So I was just standing and catching my breath. Then a man walked in, he was limping. Then I realised, one of his leg was metal. Suddenly I was just in tears. I was overly touched by how strong he was, knowing he has lost his leg. He came around to me and he started asking my name. We spoke a bit. He said to me "let me know if you need anything, give me a yell". I froze. I was in disbelief that he was so caring towards me. Shouldn't it be the other way around? Later on I was told he was a paralympic athlete. Paralympics is like Olympics but Paralympics are for athletes that has got disabilities. On top of that, he has done his honours degrees in the top university in Sydney PLUS he also trains other paralympic athletes.

I am deeply amazed at his strong will on working out. What made me embarassed is, I am far more perfect compared to him. I have both legs, both arms, both hands,... yet half the time I complain at how my image is. Face it, we humans always complain and want better things. It is not until you meet someone like this amazing man, who has lost his leg, yet he still smiles widely and thinks he is just the same as you and I. He truly is way beyond amazing. I am so blessed and thankful to have met him. He made me realise how life is wonderful if you see it positively. What made my jaw dropped was that he was training as hard as the other guys at the gym. I'm talking about heavy weight training, lifting heavy weights and all that hardcore things. He truly is my inspiration and he should be yours as well. Be thankful that you have been blessed with not having any disabilities. Doesn't it make you feel embarassed that someone like him could live such a happy life yet you still can complain about the little things in life? 

Reflect on what I just blogged. Count your blessings not your problems.

God bless you all. God bless you Tod (that's his name). 

Boredom hits!

Mood? hungry, sleep deprived & obese
Do you have any habits you'd like to break? be more strict with diet, which means stay away from sweets  
What will you remember most about 2012? meeting someone special <3
How do you feel about colourful jeans? it's cool but I'm not really into it
One of the most important lessons you learned this year? think before you act
Are you craving anything at this very moment? being in my lover's arms
What's going to be different in 2013? hopefully I am accepted to do my Master's degree